“I Don’t Need To Hold Your Hand”

On Saturday afternoon, #8 and I had an enjoyable mother-daughter excursion to Michael’s Craft Store, followed by dessert at a nearby cafe.  #8 has an artistic nature and wanted to browse through the store that had just opened in our area.

Since she was running low on her supply of watercolour paints, we replenished her stock and bought two pads of watercolour paper.  These were planned purchases.  Her impulse buy was a black, bound book of blank pages, perfect, she explained,  for sketching pictures and writing down her thoughts.  “Please, mom,” she begged, “you can take it out of my allowance.”  Where I saw a blank book, she saw artistic possibilities.  How could I refuse?

After Michael’s,  we continued on to a nearby dessert cafe.  #8 had never been there before, although my beloved and I sometimes spend time there.   My youngest chose a very sophisticated Perrier water and cherry cheesecake while I settled on a more health- conscious, figure- friendly green tea and biscotti.  We chatted and  enjoyed the time together.  She excitedly told me her plans for her new purchases and I listened and smiled.

Since it was a lovely summer day, we had left the car at home and walked to our destinations.   We had to cross two heavily trafficked areas on our route.  Instinctively, I took #8’s hand as we crossed the first major intersection.  She drew back her hand and said gently, “I don’t need to hold your hand.”

Maybe not, my love, but I need to hold yours.

Deo Gratias

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22 Responses to “I Don’t Need To Hold Your Hand”

  1. lamehousewife says:

    My baby is growing up fast, too:(

    • Isn’t it funny how we want them to grow up and then when they start growing up, we want to hold on a little bit longer.

      • lamehousewife says:

        I know. There just always that pull. My youngest son grew out of babyhood so fast, it is not even funny, but he still likes to cuddle on the couch when we read or watch TV once in awhile. Thank goodness…I don’t know what I would do if my boys all started that teenage thing all at the same time!

  2. Kate Kresse says:

    i know you have been cherishing and treasuring every moment of each child’s childhood. even then the growing and changing is bittersweet at times. sunrise, sunset~

  3. I remember when my youngest quit wanting to hold hands just like it was yesterday. Now he’s a Doctor of Pharmacy. Where did the time go?

  4. Mr. V. says:

    My son, who’s going on 11 and who weights 110 pounds, still wants to ride on my shoulders. I told him a couple of weeks ago he’s getting too big and heavy for that activity (he’s a bruiser), and he looked at me and told me that someday he’s going to be a man and I’m going to miss carrying him on my shoulders and won’t I miss the days when I used to hoist him up on my shoulders and carry him? I end up putting him up on my shoulders and then rubbing biofreeze into my aching shoulders and back later in the evening. Sigh.

  5. I do not have children, but I think that is very touching how you ended it.

    The concept of having spiritual children has intrigued me though, and while vastly different I think it is still the same in a way. By praying for them, they may not know you care, but somehow you find that you need to help them. By helping them spiritually you find that giving within of a mother.

    God bless you for taking the time to smile, listen, and be there for #8.

    • Absolutely! I don’t think you have to be a biological parent to act like one. I have a friend who’s single and her fridge is full of pictures of her “children” – young people she supports by praying for them, encouraging them in their studies/endeavours, taking them to Mass, inviting them for meals and just being available. She has more pictures on her fridge than I do. She even mothers me.

  6. Ah you’re going to make me cry!!! Seriously, I dread this day my kids don’t want to hold my hand anymore! I’m really glad that you got some one-on-one time with your youngest–it’s so important. I cherish the one-on-one and try to make it a priority. Thanks for the happy tears this morning 🙂

  7. nateaddington says:

    This was a great way for me to start the day, thanks for sharing. We officially reached half way in my wifes pregnancy this week, She said “It’s all downhill from here” I said yeah, unless we count that whole rest of our lives thing.

  8. rometome says:

    Like the Nomad, I do not have children. But the experience you just related is a blessing. Thank you.

  9. Daniel Undem says:

    My daughter said this same thing to me not all that long ago. She didn’t want to be embarrassed holding her Dad’s hand in front of her friends. Can’t believe how fast they grow up.

  10. Beverly says:

    Hello, 8KidsAndaBuisness. This is James from Biltrix, commenting vicariously through another blog to let you know that you have been nominated for some awards. Please, follow this link for the award/s: http://lifevigil.wordpress.com/2012/08/02/wow-blogger-awards-you-shouldnt-have/. If you choose to accept any of these awards, I would be most honored. God bless!

  11. mummymishy says:

    We are so similar, aren’t we. I wrote so similarly about my baby who just turned four. Your children are so lucky to have a mother like you – who takes the time to listen to them, to buy a nondescript blank book because you see through their eyes the possibilities it holds. You are a gift and I am so glad I found you. You are one of the moms out there in the blogosphere who I look up to and hope that I can be half the mother to my babies.

    Thanks for sharing this beautiful post xoxo
    http://theycallmemummy.com

    • Thank you so much for your kind words. I believe that moms learn from each other and your blog posts are among the mom-blogs I enjoy reading, especially with your quirky sense of humour. It doesn’t matter who we are, where we are, how many kids we have, or whether we work or stay home, we want the best for our kids and it’s great if we can support each other through the mom-journey.

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